Everyone wants to walk the path of least resistance, the easy, light, joyful, fun, no road-blocks, no problems or challenges road…but from my experience this is not the way to fulfillment.
All of the resistance that comes with life is actually the signal to what fears need to be faced, what challenges need to be solved, what baggage needs to be dropped, and what discomfort needs to be normalized to create better habits and choices. The contrast of life is also a motivator. That which we do not want is an invitation into clarity. That which we resist, try to go around or avoid, does indeed persist because this is the path.
Whenever I feel frustrated, uncertain, fearful or procrastinate on something I know there is a deeper reason staring me in the face and asking me to step into it and this can only be done by getting dirty, going into the muck of our soul and figuring out who we are and how we are living that is not aligned with our inner compass of right and wrong, with that gut instinct so often ignored because it doesn’t always ask us to do what is easy or least resistant but what is gritty and hard.
I’ve learned the “hard way” that being in integrity with that instinct and doing the right thing in the face of adversity or the status quo takes grit, courage and conviction. The quote “no mud, no lotus” sounds good, but it’s really an invitation to show up in the world and take a stand for what is honorable and enlivening, true and good… and the fact of the matter is, people don’t like that because it shines a light on where they are living out of integrity with themselves.
The victimhood that breathes out every excuse in the book runs rampant in the world because the seduction of an easy, lazy, no-effort, just go with the flow life has replaced the true accountability, freedom and fulfillment form living a life with discipline, self-accountability and self-responsibility. Just because it’s always been a certain way, just because coping mechanisms or patterns weaved a certain story, doesn’t mean it must remain inside the narrative of the script we get to create for ourselves.
How many times have you said or do you hear people say, “I didn’t have a choice?” Is that true? Life is riddled with choices, every moment an opportunity to use discernment and make good judgements in order to stay in integrity with who we are, our values, principles, and goals, yet when it comes to actually doing this people fall short and the internal conflict ensues.
Once that internal struggle begins, peace subsides, because when we make choices out of alignment and not in integrity with our core values, we know this deep down on a subconscious level, whether we want to admit it or not to ourselves consciously.
True peace comes from knowing yourself and then making choices every day that align with who you AND who you are becoming. It sounds so simple, yet we get pulled in a million directions and then use those distractions as excuses to not live up to our true potential.
Living in integrity is to live with grit, with focus, with the fortitude to recognize that every choice made out of alignment takes me further from harmony, further from my purpose and further from the best version of me. Living with integrity is to do what’s right even if it’s not popular, even if creates uncomfortable conversations, even if it requires confrontation and even in the face of losing something or someone that you love, because what is for us on this journey will support the growth, the stormy weather, and the inner-work necessary to maintain a life lived within this framework.
If you feel out of sorts in your life, always bring it back to integrity. Take time to re-evaluate your values so that you first and foremost are clear on this, because when you know your values, you can prioritize your days and decisions. Every moment is an opportunity for re-alignment.
Clear the distractions, stop making excuses or cluttering your life with activities, people and things that don’t align with those values and take you away from building the lifestyle, relationships and dreams that you want for yourself.
The hard truth is that living with integrity takes GRIT inside a world of weak people with weak minds, weak souls and weak spines. Integrity is for the sovereign spirit!
To get INTO-GRIT, let’s examine the following:
GOOD. Is this choice you’re making good? Meaning, is this a healthy choice for you, for who you want to be OR is the choice one from societal conditioning or pressure? When we tell ourselves we’re being “good” but it’s just a virtue signaling excuse to not show up as our highest and best self, then is it really good or just a way to avoid something uncomfortable? The road to hell is paved with good intentions because good intentions are often a mask, excuse or justification for not living in accordance with what you really want and who you really are. If the intentions are good but the actions are not taken to back it up, then one must look in the mirror and ask where are they lying to themselves? You see goodness takes honesty and benevolent action often means not being liked or validated. It's an ability to go against the flow of fish-in-the-sea swimming with the tides of perception molded by the masses who never stop to think or question anything. Instead, row your own boat with all your might against the school of fish until one day you are so strong that to go against the grain is to find flow in the current-sea of your own making, to be the changing tide, to shift the winds of time.
The fact is, doing what is good or right can be very hard. It may mean losing a business deal, walking away from a partnership or potentially lucrative financial situation, a change of environment, or having a hard conversation, but this is where peace lives, bonds strengthen and growth takes place.
REAL. Are you real? Do you show up in a way that is authentic or do you wear a mask, people please, make excuses and do everything possible to avoid your own shadow, acknowledging your own part in the reality-at-large that could only be as it is because so many walk around in a mask of politically correctness, false politeness, and fair-weather commitments to themselves and others. Being real doesn’t mean letting all your shadowy parts flail out in a chaotic mess of madness, you can still be tactful, mindful, kind and compassionate, but it is to exercise a consistent practice of clear, direct communication that is heart centered and genuine where the beauty resides.
INTEGRITY.
The dictionary defines integrity as the following:
1: firm adherence to a code of especially moral or artistic values : INCORRUPTIBILITY
2: an unimpaired condition: SOUNDNESS
3: the quality or state of being complete or undivided: COMPLETENESS
Thus, to be in integrity is to Know Thyself AND take actions and choices from this framework. It is about doing the inner-work to become more whole. It is standing in the face of adversity and saying no, that doesn’t work for me and I have a choice to make, even if there are consequences for that choice. It’s living in a way where you can lay your head on the pillow at night and sleep well because you are living in alignment with your integrity. It’s not being swayed by the propaganda, narratives, distractions, and enticements of a world that is here to knock you off your feet and then see if you are going to get back up…how many times will it take for you to see who you really are and what you are made of?
TRUTH. Are you living in truth? How can you live in truth if you are constantly seeking outside validation, confirmation and guidance over own internal knowing? Truth is an inside job, it’s the cultivation of self-awareness in order to navigate the world without getting caught up inside its web of illusion, temptations and distractions. Truth is a frequency that aligns with being in integrity, with doing the right thing, the hard thing and not the “easy” thing.
Living with integrity means walking INTO-THE-GRIT of your own dirty life, rolling up your sleeves and getting into the pit of self-transformation, contemplation, inquiry and awareness then going out into the world and saying no to everything that doesn’t align with the morals and values you stand for and yes to what does…. are you ready to live with more integrity, do you have what it takes?
Remember on the journey of inner-work not to get caught in the you-are-always-broken self-help trap that can easily become another distraction to being present, of knowing the inner work is not just about meditating or spiritual woo, but how you show up in the uncomfortable real life moments each day, little by little. It’s about not letting it all float by and unfold under the hands of fate, but by our own hands, which are extensions of Source inviting intentional action and gnosis from the inside out.
The life you are living right now is a consequence of choices made in the past, so ask yourself, what consequences (good or bad) am I creating in my future by the choices I make today? When we get in the habit of asking ourselves this question, our future begins to look a little bit brighter every day, because the power is inside of us if we are willing to own it. The compass inside of you waits for you to take the helm and guide the wheel of your own North Star. As ships passing in the night, may we salute each other on the journey, because some boats simply can’t be missed! The ones that part the seas, make waves and turn heads are lighting the way for others to fall out of line and into their true path. The least resistant path may sound good, but it’s going through the resistance that will elicit the greatest feedback for the ultimate life experience because some things cannot be avoided, so you might as well jump in head first and move through it!
Living from integrity is the only way to guarantee inner peace by knowing you did the right thing, you made the right choice, not from greed or ego, but from morals and values. The thing is, we can be in integrity with others and not ourselves, and vice versa, so be mindful that inner angst comes when our choices and actions are not aligned. No one is perfect, mistakes are made, but the awareness in each moment to recognize where we can show up a little bit different next time is how these incremental changes manifest in the biggest ways.
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AngelaMorris.com